Are Butterflies and Chemistry Part of a Good First Date?

August 31, 2022

Guy with Fish - internet dating

This is actually my husband – Bob Walmsley catching a fish. Hot as a husband – not necessary for online dating.

Do you believe that butterflies and chemistry are needed for a first date to be considered good? Much like the ubiquitous “guy holds fish” pictures displayed on dating profiles across America, there are some comments matchmakers see and hear over and over again. Namely, the single person’s desire for instantaneous first date chemistry. Butterflies. A spark

If you’ve ever been lucky enough to feel those things, you desperately want to feel them again. You want that lightning strike moment that lets you know this is the person you’re supposed to date. It’s a good feeling. It’s exciting. But guess what…. It’s not necessary.

In fact, it’s not even a good indicator that you’ve met “the one.”

A study published by Social Psychology and Personality Science suggests that romances that begin as friendship are more likely the rule rather than the exception when it comes to lasting relationships. They asked nearly 2,Dating Podcast000 happy couples how their relationship started and 68% of them said they were friends first.

So, for those of you making decisions based solely on first date chemistry and physical attractiveness, consider this: Sparks fizzle. Looks fade. Friendship lasts. If you are on a date with a quality, kind, intelligent person – pursue it! I’ve always thought intellect is what kept a relationship HOT!  

Listen more on our podcast hosted by our expert matchmakers at One on One Matchmaking!